Shopping on Black Friday

A slender moon waxing to first quarter waits for the chasing sun to steel it’s glory as I scan the woods with adjusting eyes. The west provides the most likely approach and so receives my attention. As the sun flirts with the horizon behind me, extending the reach of my eye ahead, heavy soft clouds slowly take back all that dawn granted until I am enveloped. Turning back to the east, neither sun nor moon remain. Forty yards out, a silent, shadowy figure slips through the thick air. Coyote, perhaps? Deer? Whoever passes by, the stillness surely robbed her of my scent just as the cloud denied me her identity, and she fades away both unaware and unknown.


When the woods are unseen, every sound is richer. A distant great horned owl keeps me company with a series of morning hoots while squirrels keep me vigilant, asking time and again “Are you a deer?” Slowly the cloud thinned, and woods return. Pileated woodpeckers laugh and rap, and somewhere in the distance the crack of a hunter’s rifle signals success for another who chooses shopping for venison rather than sales on this black Friday. I wonder if shoppers in the mall find as much satisfaction there, amid domestic chaos and competition for excess, as I find here bathed in wild minimalism.


After four hours of sitting silently, sipping my tea, the need to slip back to earth arises and I climb from my perch with as little disruption as I am able. Carefully, I ease eastward along the old fence. A bent No Trespassing sign warns others against joining me on this side. Across man’s imagined boundary, a series of young trees suffer the aggression of a young buck, their bark and cambium stripped away, yellow sapwood abraded and raw.

Reaching the edge of the woods, I find the shell of a box turtle resting in the grass, belly up, abdominal scutes still plated and attached to the shell, and I wonder how he ended up this way. Was this upending the cause of his demise?

Climbing the dam, I crouch low, aware that deer often bed in the tall grass east of the shallow, spring-fed pond. A kingfisher chatters loudly. There are no deer to be seen when I crest, only the kingfisher lighting atop a stump in the mostly dry pond bed. Seeing me, she flies in two great swoops to a tree on the far bank. I sit in the grass and watch until she decides to cross the farm to another hunting ground.


Circling the pond, I come across another line of buck rubs, these ones on larger trees and higher on the trunks. Two years ago, I saw four large bucks bedded here. Perhaps one of them is still visiting. The old coyote den shows fresh evidence of excavation after two years of dormancy. Perhaps the figure I saw in the woods this morning lives here?

I circumnavigate the pond to find three killdeer standing motionless in the late morning sun, and I stop to take a couple photos. They are too far for the shots I would like given the small lens with which I am equipped, but they don’t mind my presence and I sit with them for a few minutes before completing the loop back to my stand.


Lunch is now beckoning, so I walk to the truck. Following lunch, a full belly calls for a nap.

Rested, I return to my stand with a couple hours of light remaining. I carefully scan 360 degrees, then arrange camera, tea and phone on the bench beside me. A friend has joined me this evening in a tree 130 years behind me and I send him a quick text to ensure he knows the rules—either sex is allowed. I turn the ringer off and place my phone face down next to the camera and scan to the west. Yellows and oranges seem to have faded to browns over the past week, but the reds, deep and rich, are brought to life by the low sun—my kind of holiday decorations!

As I turn back to the south, the sun finds a pathway through the trees catching my glasses and reflecting harsh spots on four does standing fifty yards in front of me. With neither snort nor stomp, they jump and scatter. Four tails disappearing with four single bounds, and in seconds the woods are quiet. Oh, well. I remove my reading glasses and set them with the phone beside me.


Time passes quickly watching a setting sun through autumn woods and, with it, my shopping trip is over and Black Friday  fades to darkness.

All the Hogs in Heaven

This is a new draft of a chapter I began many months ago. It has gone through some serious changes and I expect it to be pretty rough, but I hope some folks will read it and give me early feedback. Thanks!

All the Hogs in Heaven

East of Chestnut Ridge, a very rugged mile up, over and down from Cold Creek Spring, John Essert set his empty coffee cup on the kitchen table, stood up, kissed his wife Clara on the forehead, and walked to the front door.

Through a broad smile, John’s breath formed a cloud before him as he stepped off the porch of his little farmhouse on a late November morning. He paused to survey the scene. Directly in front of him, halfway between the house the narrow dirt road, stood a nearly six-foot diameter stump—evidence of his recent labors. As he looked at the fresh cut tree surrounded by sawdust, he opened and closed his strong hands and felt the blisters formed beneath already tough skin. Felling, sawing, and splitting took a different toll on both muscles and palms than the work he had done in the foundry, and he was feeling it. He straightened his back and shoulders, flexing his sore muscles.

To his left, roughly 1000 feet north along the road, he could just see the roof of the old barn on the corner of the property. Between the small yard he had cleared around the house and the barn, was a tangle of blackberry and young eastern red cedars, with occasional patches of waist high brown grass and flower stalks. Using scythe, machete, and hatchet he had cleared a perimeter path around the north two-thirds of the property forming a rectangle roughly 800 feet by 550 feet. This would be the fence line for the main pasture. On three sides, the path was narrow—just enough room to work. Along the Eastern border, along off the road, the path was wide enough for a team to pull a wagon, and there were already worn tracks from all the trips he had made to and from the tree stump and the barn.

A flock of juncos flushed from the lane as he started out. A white-throated sparrow called from somewhere in the edge of the blackberry Mis-ter Peabody, peabody, peabody… it sang. “I sure wish Daddy could see this,” he said aloud. It was always his father’s wish that his son would be on Chestnut Ridge, and now he was. The land he grew up on was a few miles north of there, closer to town, but this was, in many ways better land that the property his father was forced to sell late in life. There was a year round sep on the ridge above the south end of the pasture that he hoped would one-day feed a pond, and this part of the ridge had a lot more chestnut trees than the old home place.

Looking at the ridge bordering the west side of the property and the giant trees on the steep slope, John remembered the words of his father so many years ago as they gathered chestnuts on the other end of the ridge. “Son,” he had said, “Listen to me close, and remember what I say. A family of four with all the hogs in heaven can survive even the hardest winter on this ridge, as long as they have these chestnut trees.” John’s daddy had a flair for the dramatic, especially when he talked about the life he loved out there on Chestnut Ridge. “Them trees is a gift from God!” He declared time and time again.

That November had been “the month of the axe” for John. For three and half weeks, he worked on the big tree in front of the house. First, he climbed the giant chestnut tree and took off what limbs he could using a hand saw. Later, with the help of Mr. Putnam, he felled it perfectly parallel to the road. John and Mr. Putnam cleaned up the remaining limbs, cutting them into logs for the wood stove, then they measured and cut the long trunk to the proper lengths for posts and rails, which they finally split. They never took time to count but John reckoned they must have split three thousand rails out of that trunk and who knows how many hundreds of posts. For his help, Mr. Putnam took all the posts and rails he wanted for his neighboring property. The rest of it was piled on the north side of the barn, underneath the shed next to the wagon.

John planned on laying out the posts that morning before walking over to Mr. Putnam’s place. They had agreed to build John’s fence first so he could get the livestock—especially the goats that would work on clearing the blackberry. He stopped at the near end of the barn and swung open the doors to the horse stalls. Founder was fidgeting in her stall, ready to get to work. Sally, as always, stood calmly, munching on some hay. “I’ll get you ladies hooked up in a minute,” John said, scratching Sally’s cheek. “It’s gonna be a beautiful day.” Founder nodded her head and whinnied as if either agreeing with John’s prediction or trying to hurry him along. “Hold tight, Founder, It won’t be long.”

He walked back outside and around the barn to the right. When he saw the wagon tongue and front wheels sticking out from the shed, he picked up his pace. “Putnam must have used the wagon yesterday,” he said.

John made trips to the barn at least twice a day to feed the horses or fetch tools, but had not walked to the shed on the farm end of the barn in a week. “Maybe I left it that way…”

When he reached the corner and looked under the shed, he stopped. Turning around, he looked out towards the overgrown pasture, then ran around the barn to search both ways up and down the road. The simple wooden gate at the head of the short drive was not latched and swung halfway open. Where the lane dipped just before the road, a single chestnut post lay in the grass.

John picked up the post and walked back to the shed. He scratched his head as he looked down at the bare ground. That post in his hands was the only piece of chestnut left. The rest of it, every single stick, was gone.

For the first time that morning, John felt the chill that was in the air, and he pulled his canvas jacket tight, buttoning the top two buttons.

He put his hands in his pockets and kicked the ground. Livestock would be delivered the following week, so getting this fence up was imperative.

He stared at the ground with his hands in his pockets. When the pigs arrived, they could be turned into the woods for mast, but if he was to have goats working on clearing the pasture, they would require a fence. Founder neighed. “Sit tight, girl. I’m afraid it might e a little while, now,” he called through the barn door.

John walked back to the house where Clara was in the kitchen making a second pot of coffee.

“Ready for a cup already?” She asked. “Johnny is sleeping. I thought I would get him up in a little bit and bring a pot out there to you. Where is Mr. Putnam? You didn’t leave him out there to work without you…”

“Ain’t no work to do, Clara. Mr. Putnam isn’t out there because there ain’t no work to do.”

Clara poured a cup of coffee and waited patiently for her husband to explain himself. His brow was furrowed and his lips pursed. He tugged at the skin on his Adam’s apple. She added cream to the cup and handed it to her husband without saying anything.

He took a sip followed by a deep breath, then pulled out a chair and sat down at the kitchen table.

“Somebody stole the tree… the wood. It’s all gone. All the posts, all the rails. They’re gone.”

“Did they take anything else? The horses? Tools?”

“Everything else is there. They didn’t take the wagon. They must have come prepared. The horses are fine.”

Clara sat down at the table beside her husband, put her hand on his, and looked at him. He had changed in the few weeks since they moved to Chestnut Ridge. His blue eyes shone bright surrounded by a face darkened from working in the sun. She held his rough hand on the table.

When Clara returned home from her first date with John seven years earlier, her sister, seeing her skip up the drive, asked her about her suitor. “He has the strongest hands,” she had said. Clara admitted to her sister that hands were a strange reason to fall in love with someone, but “He makes me feel safe,” she said.

From the back of the house, they heard the voice of Johnny. “We’ll be okay,” Clara said, standing up and kissing John on the forehead. He let go of her hand and watched her red hair fall to her chest as she stood upright. “Of course we will,” he said as she left the kitchen.

John finished his cup and walked back across the property and through the woodlot between his land and Mr. Putnam’s place. If his daddy was right that Chestnut trees would get a family through a hard winter, it was neighbors who would get each other through every other hardship. He knocked on the door and Mr. Putnam stepped out with boots on, ready to work.

After discussing the situation, John and Mr. Putnam walked and carefully measured the pasture, then did the same on Mr. Putnam’s land. Mr. Putnam did the math on the side of the barn, figuring just how many posts and rails would be needed for each job, then they inventoried the wood piled in Mr. Putnam’s field. If all they did was secure John’s main pasture, there would be enough wood to complete that and all the fencing Mr. Putnam wanted. They would fell another tree for the remaining work at John’s later.

Mr. Putnam was older than John by a decade and a half, and had grown up on the property next door, inheriting it when his father passed away earlier that year. Like John’s property, the land had not been worked in many years, and his pasture was in similar shape—an overgrown, tangled mess. John knew Mr. Putnam’s first name was the same as his own, but John Putnam had been a supervisor at the foundry and John couldn’t bring himself to calling him anything but “mister.”

It took the two men three days of digging, tamping, bracing, and finally stringing wire to complete the fence around John’s pasture. When they were finished, John swung open the barn door, opened the stalls, and let Founder and Sally out of the barn.

The following day, a Saturday, six goats arrived and the blackberry began to disappear. The men decided to take Sunday off so, first thing the next morning, John, Clara and Johnny went for their first long exploration on the side of Chestnut Ridge.

As late in the season as it was, neither of them expected to find many nuts, but they took along a sack anyway. “Feels good to have that fence up,” John said. “But we need to pick out another tree to fell for fencing around the garden and for pig fencing. This one doesn’t have to be as big as the last one.”

The two of them walked silently, hand in hand in hand towards the edge of the woods at the base of the ridge. “Remember the last time we walked the ridge?” Clara asked as they neared the wood.

“Of course, I do,” said John, squeezing Clara’s hand. “September 25, 1925.”

“Can you believe it as been that long?”

“Feels like yesterday to me.”

* * *

September 25, 1925 was day John and Clara were married. There was no money for a honeymoon in those days, so following the simple ceremony at Clara’s parent’s house, they did what they loved the most. They went chestnut hunting on the ridge.

They filled their sacks that day, but most of their time was spent strolling through the woods, holding hands, chatting gaily. More than once they stopped to look into each other’s eyes and share a kiss.

Throughout their courtship, early fall trips to Chestnut Ridge had been a tradition for the two of them. They would park in front of the abandoned farmhouse and spend entire days walking the ridge and gathering nuts, always ending the day with a picnic beneath the giant tree in front of the house. While enjoying their hard-earned sandwiches, they would dream of one day having a place like that for themselves. “One day I want to raise my boys out here on Chestnut Ridge,” he would say. “In house just like this one.”

The only difference between their wedding day venture and so many previous trips—aside from being a little less worried about someone seeing them kiss—was the mason jar John opened after building a small fire for their picnic. He took a sip, and handed the jar to Clara who took a sniff and pushed it away from her face. “Where did you get this?” she asked.

“Bill Tucker, from the foundry, gave it to us. It’s a wedding present.”

“And where did he get this, John? You know it’s illegal!”

“I know Clara. It was a gift, and I didn’t ask where he got it.”

Clara took a tiny sip from the jar and smiled at her husband. “It’s sweet.”

“Yeah, I don’t know much about moonshine, but Bill said this was ‘the good stuff.’”

When the fire was down to coals, John pulled out his knife and scored exes into the sides of a couple dozen nuts and tossed them in a small pan which he set on the coals. Soon they were enjoying chestnuts with their corn, and agreeing that the two things made a very nice combination.

It was well past dark when, finally, they made it home. Usually, they would take the time to spread out their harvest to cure for three or four days before putting it in the ice box, but neither of them was in the mood for work, and John put their brimming sacks in the closet by the wood stove. “We can deal with these later,” he said, leading Clara by the hand to the bedroom that the day before was his, but now belonged to the two of them.

In the days following their honeymoon hike, Clara spent her days focused on setting up their home while John worked at the foundry. Neither of them thought about the nuts in the closet.

A few weeks later John came home from work to find Clara standing in the living room, looking puzzled, holding out her hand. “What are these little worms?” she asked. “I found them in the living room. In her outstretched hand were four yellowish grubs about the size of fat grains of rice. “I don’t know,” John said. “Looks like fish bait to me.” Clara laughed, and tossed them outside.

The next day she found a few more… and the next, and the next.

When finally they thought about the chestnuts, and opened the closet door, they found a mess. Something had hatched in the chestnut sacks, and eaten through every one of the nut, leaving behind bags full of mealy nuts, a mess of worm poop, and countless little grubs wriggling around the bag, the floor, the lower half of the walls. They cleaned up the mess, and dumped it in the compost.

As they dumped the last of the nuts, John apologized to Clara. “I’m sorry I didn’t dealt with these properly when we brought them in the house. They never should have been left in the closet.” Clara looked up at her husband and raised her eyebrows. “Have you forgotten that night, already?”

John blushed, then grinned, “Or, maybe not,” he said.

“Definitely not, Mr. Essert.”

“No. Definitely not, Mrs. Essert.”

It was just about nine months to the day after their honeymoon hike and picnic that Clara became a mama, and 12 months after that, that they found hundreds of long-legged, tan beetles with long slender downturned probosces. The larvae had grown into adult chestnut weevils.

With John Junior keeping them busy, and all those weevils reminding them of the mess from the year before, John and Clara didn’t go back to Chestnut Ridge that year or the three following years.

In 1930, John lost his job at the foundry, and there was no work to be had in town. The Esserts were forced to make a change. A lot of men lost their jobs that year… a lot of families were struggling. But since the day they were married John and Clara had been putting money back. They had a nest egg gifted to the by Clara’s parents, and in five years they had added enough money to it, that when they heard the old clapboard house and some acres on the side of the ridge were for sale, they were ready.

They didn’t even drive out to see the place. They simply met the seller at the bank, wrote a check, signed some papers, and started packing. As they walked home from the bank, John looked at Clara. “Can you believe we just bought our dream?”

“I always knew we would. What I can’t believe is that we didn’t even drive out there to look at it first.”

“We know that place better than anybody,” John responded.

A few days later, they pulled up in front of the house which hadn’t changed a bit since they were last there, and the giant chestnut tree, under which they had honeymooned, and about which they had dreamed, was still standing tall. John reached in his pocket for the key to the house and stepped up to the porch.

“Something ain’t right,” he said. “That tree should still have leaves on it, and there should be some green burrs on the ground. I’m afraid it’s dead. Can you believe that?”

“Well… the place is sure going to look different without that tree,” said Clara.

“It sure is, but it’s okay. We’ll plant another tree. How about a couple apple trees or pears?”

“That sounds lovely!”

“And the yard won’t be as big a mess without all those burrs, either.” Said John, looking for as many positives as he could. “And, we’ll have plenty of chestnuts out in the woods. Like Daddy always said, ‘a family of four…”

“And all the hogs in heaven…” Clara finished with a laugh.

John put his arm around Clara and held her tight. “We’ll be just fine,” he said.

* * *

Being late November, John didn’t expect there to be many nuts left in the woods, but Clara and Johnny looked anyway while John scouted out a good tree for fencing.

The forest floor was littered with old, brown burs like the ones in the yard, but none that looked to be that year’s crop. Even so, Johnny soon called out that he had found a nut and eagerly asked “Can I eat it?” Sure, John told him. “You’re gonna like them a lot better roasted, but I used to eat them raw when I was a boy.”

Johnny dropped the nut into his daddy’s hand.

“Yessiree,” he said sounding eerily like his father. “There is nothing like a raw chestnut, right off the ground.”

John opened his knife to score the thin shell, but the blade went right through the shell and nut like he was cutting into a paper oak gall. The inside was a mealy mush, and were it not for his calloused hands, he might have cut himself.

“Sorry, Johnny. This one’s not good. Keep looking.”

John dropped the remains of the nut, and Johnny scoured the ground for another chestnut. About fifty away, John saw a two-foot trunk. “This one is perfect,” He said. “And close to the edge of the words, so we can get the wagon close.”

Climbed farther, the ridge looked just as they remembered it. Every fourth tree was a chestnut, some of them giants as big or bigger than the one that had grown in front of the house, but there was a disturbing pattern to the forest.

“More than half these trees are dead,” he said, looking up at one that was nearly eight feet across at the base. “The woods are dying.”

“All of them?”

“Not all the trees, but it looks like something is killing all the chestnuts.”

They hiked the length of their property and onto the land separating them from Mr. Putnam where they found an old road winding up the ridge.

“I don’t remember seeing this before,” said Clara.

“Me neither.”

“I guess we never walked this far before.”

Thy followed the road down the ridge where it ran straight through the woodlot.

“Funny, I walked right through this patch of woods to get to Mr. Putnam’s place several times, and never even noticed that I was crossing a road. Looks like it used to go all the way from the main road to the top of the ridge. I wonder where it goes from there.”

They followed the fence back to the house where Clara made lunch while John and Johnny sat in the Morris chair in the living room reading a book about a little boy named Balser who was a great bear hunter during frontier days in southern Indiana.

“Do you think there are bears in our woods?” Johnny asked his father.

“I don’t know. Would you like there to be?”

“I think so,” said the four-year-old. “But I don’t want to shoot them.”

“Well, then we will go looking for them.”

“But we won’t shoot them.”

“No, we won’t shoot them.”

“And we have to go together.”

“Yes, of course. Shall we invite Mama?”

“Do you think she would want to?”

“I don’t know.”

Clara, who was listening from the kitchen, chimed in: “I think as long as I have you by my side, Johnny, I would love to go looking for bears!”

“Yay!” said Johnny. “Read more about Balser, Papa!”

“Okay. Let’s see, where were we?”

“Balser was up in the tree.”

“Ah, yes. When Balser had fixed himself firmly on the limb he proceeded at once to load his gun…”

Over that winter, John and Mr. Putnam felled the chestnut John selected on the edge of the woods and, with it, finished all the fencing. John cleared and plowed a garden patch behind the house and covered it with leaves, and did the same at Putnam’s place.

The Esserts took a lot of winter walks on the ridge, and John was troubled by the lack of living chestnuts, but didn’t talk about it much. On one of their hikes, they followed the old road as it wound behind Mr. Putnam’s property, which did not include any of the ridge, switchbacking to the top of the ridge where it passed through a cut in the sandstone bluff to a previously logged area on top of the ridge.

The following spring, as the forest leafed out, the severity of the chestnut situation was stark. Thousands of brown, dead giants stood head and shoulders above the greening canopy for as far as the eye could see up and down down the Chestnut Ridge.

“A family of four with all the hogs in heaven can survive even the hardest winter on this ridge, as long as they have these chestnut trees.” John said, again, as he walked the pasture that April. “But what happens when there are no damn chestnut trees?”

A Close Call

In this chapter, Kimball (originally Tommy) and Jimmy are a few years older. Kimball’s father has passed on, and with the Chestnut trees mostly dead, the boys are under pressure to make a living. They have resorted to the ways of their Uncle Buddy, and Kimball is making his first delivery. The chapter is coming in a little short compared to most of the others, but I might let it stay that way. As always, let me know what you think. Any and all feedback is welcome.

A Close Call

A single lantern glowed faintly beneath the Cherry Street bridge. Kimball turned back the throttle so the boat held itself against the current, as he scanned the bank carefully. Keeping to his right, he eased up river between the island and the tall cliffs along the south bank. Rounding the upper end of the long island that split the river into two channels just upriver from the bridge, he shut off the motor and pulled it out of the water. Moving to the middle of the boat, he took up the oars and controlled the boat slowly downriver towards the bridge abutment.

There moon had not yet risen, and high clouds kept starlight to a minimum. Timing was perfect. Rowing backwards, Kimball ferryied the boat towards the north bank. As he neared his destination, he looked hard into the shadows on either side of the abutment. Everything was dark–too dark, perhaps. It would be nearly impossible to see anybody who wasn’t carrying a light.

The dim lantern beneath the bridge swung left, right, and left again, went dark for a few seconds, then reappeared—the “all clear” signal he was looking for. Kimball rowed silently towards the light.

There were no words exchanged as he tossed bowline to the gentleman on the shore. The man receiving him did not tie the boat off after hauling him in. Should anything go wrong, there would be no time for untying knots. Instead, he piled the rope on the deck of the boat and watched Kimball pull back the tarp at his feet to reveal twenty one-gallon glass jugs arranged neatly on the floor.

Kimball didn’t know the man he was meeting personally. He and Mr. Hellis, and they had never met face-to-face, communicating through notes left in small mason jar beneath the Turbid Creek bridge at the mouth of the gorge. That was where Mr. Hellis, after tasting a small left for him, had delivered a down payment for this first batch. The quality was everything Kimball and Jimmy had hoped for. They had made high-end liquor and it would be sold to wealthy white customers, mostly in the Carriage Hill neighborhood.

Pulling up to the shore now and seeing the shadowy figure before him, he smiled nervously. Being a criminal was new to Kimball, and his hands were shaking visibly as he stowed the oars, tilted the boat out of the water to avoid the rocks, and stood up in the boat.

He took a single step forward, and was suddenly blinded by lights coming from multiple sources on shore. Several voices were yelling all at once: “Federal Police! Put your hands over your heads!” Kimball jumped to the back of the boat and fumbled for the release lever to drop the motor back in the water.

Blinded, it was hard to tell exactly what was happening on shore in front of him. Somebody, perhaps Mr. Hellis, bumped the boat, sending away from the bank, just enough to set it adrift, but not enough to prevent an agent from jumping from the riprap on shore to the prow of the boat.

The agent steadied himself on the front deck of the boat that was drifting farther from the shore and beginning to catch the current. “Put your hands on your head and turn around!” the agent commanded. “We don’t want things to get worse for you than they already are!” The agent was drawing his revolver as Kimball released the motor into the river. Kimball was not about to give up. “Turn around, and put your hands on your head,” the agent repeated. “We’ve got you red-handed and we know who you are, Kimball Tucker.” When he heard his name, Kimball’s hands shook even harder, and he struggled with the release lever on the Evinrude. The agent reached with his left foot from the deck to the bottom of the boat, but the stowed oars and twenty jugs of liquor prevented him from making a quick easy path to the back of the boat. Kimball had never looked down the barrel of a gun other than when cleaning his shotgun. The officer gripped his pistol tight and shouted again, “Put your hands over our head Kimball! We’ve got you! A the officer shouted, Kimball managed to release the outboard motor and quickly slap the lever into reverse. He twisted the throttle wide open, and took a firm hold of the handle on the starting rope. One hard yank, and the 18 horsepower Evinrude roared to life. Kimball threw the steering lever hard away from him, causing the boat to launch into a backwards clockwise circle and throwing the off-balance agent over the left side of the boat, his revolver splashing several feet beyond him and his hat floating downstream. Kimball jerked the steering lever back towards him to avoid running over the man in the water.

Kimball eased off the throttle and shifted the motor into neutral. Seeing the officer had his head above water with only his pride wounded, he slapped the shift lever to forward, cranked the throttle, and disappeared into the darkness. Having no boat, the agents were unable to give chase. All they could do was listen to Kimball’s Evinrude fading into the night and shout commands Kimball couldn’t hear over the racing Evinrude. No shots were ever fired.

In high water, the snaking Muskogee River gorge was filled with hazards, and the water was not particularly high that night, so any boatman would be challenged to navigate, especially at high speed, and especially in the dark. Even if the feds had brought a boat, they would be at a huge disadvantage trying to catch a teen who was raised on the river like Kimball. Rumors were afoot that Tennessee Valley Authority was making plans to dam the Muskogee at the bottom of the gorge to make it more navigable for larger boats and to control flooding, but for now the river was still wild, and Kimball was in charge. He knew the river well, and navigated the boulders and rapids perfectly—keeping right until he came to the pier across from the foundry, then cutting hard left to avoid a strainer and following the left bank around the bend at the foot of the mountain. Even below Uncle Island where Turbid Creek flowed off the plateau creating a hydraulic legendary for sucking boats under and pinning their crew to the bottom of the river, Kimball knew just where to make his line. He was just below Turbid Creek when reached forward, twisted the lid off the nearest jug, lifted the jug out of the boat, and lowered it into the black river. One by one, he did the same with the other nineteen jugs. By the time Kimball was safely within the steep walls of the Gorge, whatever felony he might had committed was diluted a million times over by a raging Muskogee River.

An hour after fleeing the fiasco under the bridge, Kimball pulled his flat bottom boat up to the dock, where Sheriff Charley Saylor was waiting. Kimball smiled, both because it was always good to see his father’s friend, and because there were no federal agents with him. He tossed Sheriff Saylor a line, which he secured to a cleat on the pier. Then, with a handshake, the sheriff helped his old friend out of the boat. The whole time, the sheriff’s lantern had been illuminating the empty boat. Now, he knelt down and lifted the canvas. As he assumed, there was nothing there tying Kimball to what everybody knew he had just attempted to do. The only things left in the boat were the oars, a life preserver, and a lantern. Both men were relieved by the lack of evidence. Sheriff Saylor did not want to handcuff his friend—not on that night, especially not so soon following his father’s death.

Kimball told the sheriff he had been out doing a little night fishing. “The mayflies are hatching,” he said. “Makes for good fishing. We should go sometime… like we used to with Papa. We used to have some good fishing on the river, didn’t we Charley? I would have stayed out later, but I was getting hungry.” The sheriff nodded in agreement that they did indeed have some good times fishing together. He did not bother asking Kimball why there was no fishing equipment in the boat.

They both knew the feds did not want Kimball arrested on a misdemeanor resisting arrest charge that would do little to stem the flow of liquor out of the gorge, so Sheriff Saylor gave Kimball a symbolic warning, then he asked him to give his regards to his Mama, and to please be careful. “You know if that agent had drowned back there under the bridge, there would be nothing I could do for you, Kimball.” Kimball assured the sheriff he didn’t know what he was talking about, but thanked him for his advice, anyway, and told him he would, indeed, be careful.

“Would you like to come in for a bite? You do’t have to rush off. You came all this way, after all.”

“No thanks, Kimball. Another time,” he responded.

They walked together to the cabin where Kimball watched from the porch as the sheriff continued on to his car. Sheriff Saylor turned around as he opened the car door for one last word with his friend. “Think about what happened tonight, Kimball. You pissed some people—people with badges, guns, and something to prove. Things are gonna get a lot tougher on you and your cousin if you keep this up. Think about calling it quits before it gets ugly for you. I don’t want to see you ending up like your Uncle Buddy, and sure don’t want that happening to your Mama. You know there ain’t much I can do for you when it comes to federal agents, Kimball. You aren’t just another tax-evading moonshiner in the county anymore. You are wanted by the federal government now. The feds have you marked, and they will come after you with or without my help.” Kimball waved goodbye from the porch, and Sheriff Saylor got in his car and drove away.

As soon as the sheriff’s car was out of sight, Jimmy emerged from the barn. “You alright? What happened?”

Kimball told his cousin the whole story. He was somehow calm while speaking with the Sheriff, but now his whole body was shaking again as relayed the details of the evening.

“Well, we can’t go back to that drop site. We’ll have to come up with a new plan,” said Jimmy. “Did they arrest Mr. Hellis?”

“I don’t know,” said Kimball. “I doubt it since he hadn’t even touched the liquor when they came after us. I don’t know what they could arrest him on other than helping a fellow beach his boat in the dark, and I don’t think that’s a crime. The feds really screwed up, you know. If they had waited until we had a jug or two on shore, I don’t think I’d be standing here.”

“Yeah, probably not. We’re gonna have to be a lot more careful from here on out.”

“And don’t forget that we have some of his money,” said Kimball with raised eyebrows. “I’ll leave Hellis a message tomorrow, telling him not to worry, and that we’ll have him a new batch in a week.”

“We’ll have to get up on the plateau for more corn,” said Jimmy. “And that’s gonna take all our cash, so we have to get it right this time.”

“Yeah, but more important is the answer to the question we haven’t asked yet.”

“How did the feds know…”

“That’s right,” continued Kimball thoughtfully. After a pause, he added, “Nobody knew about our sale but Mr. Hellis. And nobody else even knows about the still either.”

“Him… and the Sheriff…” added Jimmy.

“And Mama.”

“Yeah, Mama knows everything.”

“You think Hellis was in on it?” Jimmy asked.

“Could be. I don’t know him. Johnny Baxter told me about him. He’s the one who set up the first communication.”

“So Johnny knows.”

“Yeah, but remember that Johnny is selling liquor too. He picked up Uncle Buddy’s clients when he got arrested. It wouldn’t be in his interest to snitch on us. Plus, he didn’t know about the drop. All he knew was that we talked to Hellis. For all he knows we might not even be cooking yet… unless Hellis told him about the meet.”

“Well we know it wasn’t Saylor or Mama, so it has to be Hellis.”

“I think your right,” Kimball said.

“So what do we do?” Jimmy asked, more to the river than to his cousin, his voice trailing off as he walked along the river bank, thinking.

Kimball picked up a stone and tried skipping it, but the current caught it on the first splash, turning it sideways and pulling it into the water.

Jimmy turned around and walked back to Kimball. “Here’s what we’ll do,” he said. We owe Mr. Hellis some liquor, but we can’t sell him liquor because we don’t trust him now. That means we need to give him his money back, but we can’t do that because we need that money to cook a second batch. So, this is how I see it: You get a message to Hellis telling him to give us a couple weeks for the heat to settle down. Tell him we will cook some more liquor, and let him know when we feel safe. Assure him that everything is okay.”

“But what happens when we don’t deliver?” Interrupted Kimball.

“We’ll cook some more liquor and find a new buyer. As soon as we make the sale, we’ll send Hellis the message that we don’t feel safe, and we are refunding him his deposit. We can make enough on a sale to easily cover him, and set ourselves up for the next several batches. All we need is one good sale to kickstart us.”

“You’re brilliant Cousin,” said Kimball, patting Jimmy on the back.

“I ain’t brilliant yet,” Jimmy responded. “Let’s see if it works.”

“It’ll work. Tomorrow morning, I’ll take the Model T up the plateau and pick up some corn. While I’m there, I’ll do some asking around. Somebody up there will have a good connection, and if we sell in Wright County instead of Weaver, we can avoid Saylor and maybe things will settle back down.”

“Do you think we can sell the good stuff over there, away from the city?”

“Yeah, there’s rich folks on the mountain who want corn liquor.”

“Okay, so we just need to make sure nobody finds the still.

“I’m not worried about the still. There’s no public road out there, so to find us they would have to either come by boat or on the logging road from the other side of the ridge, which would mean using horses, and even then they would have another difficult two mile hike ahead of them to find our spring.”

“I hope your’e right,” said the younger cousin.

“Yeah, me too, Cousin. Me, too.”

“Kimball looked up at the sliver of waning moon rising over the ridge through breaking clouds. “We’ve got a few good dark nights this week. Let’s take advantage of them. You think we can move the mules in the dark?”

“I think so,” said Jimmy. I can finish up the pen in the morning while you are over in Wright County. The new moon is tomorrow, so that will be the best time to do it. We’ll take them over one at a time, then show them the route the next morning.”

“Good. Do you think the pen is far enough from the river?”

“Yeah. I’ve been up and down the river and you can’t see it from anywhere. We might have to move it come winter when the leaves drop, but for now we’ll be fine.”

“Hey, come winter we’ll be out of this business. We do this right and we’ll make enough money off this liquor to keep property taxes paid for the rest of our lives and we won’t have to worry about feds, or taxes ever again.”

“Or your Mama.”

“Or my Mama,” repeated Kimball. “Next summer we’ll take Sheriff Saylor fishing and laugh about all of this…”

“I Don’t know about that, Cousin.”

“Everything is going to work out just fine. Let’s go get some sleep, Tomorrow is another big day.

Hull Go! Take Two

Below is a new draft of a piece I posted way back in June. I received some good feedbakc from readers, some of which I heeded, some I ignored and some that still has me scratching my head trying to figure it out. Let me know what you think about this rewrite. Thanks!

Hull Go!

The late afternoon sun had peaked and was resting a brief spell before falling over the western rim of the River Gorge. Two young boys, one a head taller than the other, stood facing each other under the canopy of a giant tree just north of the small gray log cabin. Over the boys’ heads, bright green, oblong leaves, tapered to sharp points and edged with delicate barbs drooped from limbs several feet out of reach. Beneath their bare feet, the shaded ground was heavily littered with years of debris from the tree, contrasting the rest of the yard that was dominated by plantain, dandelion, and scattered clumps of grasses kept knocked down by a sling blade. Between the house and the river, a fall garden was still producing a few collards and some winter squash. On the lee side of the house, a lonely, narrow dirt road with no name passed by. Beyond the road, a dense wood grew up a steep escarpment to the vast craggy plateau beyond.

The taller of the two boys, an eleven year old named Kimball, stood with outstretched arms, hands cupped together. “Hull go!” he yelled at the other.

The shorter boy, Jimmy, who was three years younger than his cousin, waited for him to finish whatever it was he was yelling at him. Everything in the River Gorge was new, strange, and sudden to Jimmy including whatever Kimball was yelling, and the confusion of it all left him overflowing with emotions he didn’t recognize. Several times that day, he hadn’t known whether to cry, scream, or run. Each time he managed exactly what he did now—he stood and waited for something to either change or make sense. He wasn’t frightened or uncomfortable with his cousin or his surroundings. To the contrary, he felt a certain comfort in having a companion who was not an adult, but not as young as he was, either, and Jimmy knew he would be lost without him. “Hull go!” Kimball yelled again.

The boys looked like they could be brothers—both had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes but Kimball’s hair was shaggy, unlike the close cut worn by Jimmy. Along with the height Kimball had on Jimmy, he was significantly broader in the shoulders, and more muscular. Perhaps the biggest difference between their appearances, however, was their skin. Kimball’s hands were calloused and rough, his feet toughened from summers running barefoot around the cabin and the woods of the River Gorge. He was weathered. On his right forearm was a long, jagged scar about which Jimmy had not yet found the courage to ask. Without a shirt, Kimball’s deeply tanned arms, neck, and face contrasted his white torso. Jimmy, by comparison, was pale, soft, and weak.

“Hull go!” Kimball yelled again, this time slower, with heavier emphasis on both words.

Jimmy looked at Kimball’s cupped hands and wondered what he was hiding—some captured critter, a frog perhaps, or a lizard, or if maybe a secret treasure. Either way, he wished he would stop yelling at him and just show him what he was hiding. His words “Hull go” made no sense, and he didn’t know how to respond. As difficult as his first day in the gorge had been, at least he spoke the same language as his cousin. Now he wasn’t even sure of that, and he felt himself breaking. He did not want to cry in front of his cousin.

When Kimball saw Jimmy’s upper lip beginning to quiver, he remembered the serious talk his parents had with him the night before about this new family member. “Everything will be new for him here,” Mama had said, “and it’s up to you to make him feel at home, to be extra nice to him, to be his teacher. He’s more than a cousin now. He’s your brother, and he has been through more than you can imagine. You have a big responsibility, Kim.” Kimball knew Mama meant business when she addressed him as Kim. She reserved the shortened name for serious talks—grown-up talks, and right then, standing before his new brother who was on the verge of tears, Kimball knew it was time for him to be more grown-up than ever.

Kimball looked at the wet eyes before him and smiled gently as he opened his hands to reveal four shiny brown nuts, each about the size of an average striker marble but roughly onion shaped and flat on one side.

“When I say ‘hull go,’ you’re supposed to guess how many nuts I have in my hand. If you get it right, you get the nuts. That’s how the game works. Since you didn’t know that, you can have them this time,” he offered.

Jimmy sniffled and wiped his eyes, then opened his hands. Kimball dropped the nuts into his shaking palms, one of them tumbling over his fingers, onto the ground. He quickly knelt to pick it up, looking nervously at Kimball, afraid he might have done something wrong.

“It’s okay if you drop them,” Kimball said gently. “You can’t hurt them. You try it now. Hide some nuts in your hand and when you say, ‘Hull go,’ I’ll try to guess how many you have.”

Jimmy turned around and fumbled with the nuts.

“Hull go!” he yelled excitedly as he wheeled back around, eyes now sparkling, hands cupped together tightly in front of him.

Kimball looked down at Jimmy’s hands and gave his best thoughtful look before offering, “Three?”

“Nope. Guess again,” said Jimmy with a giggle, clearly pleased that he had fooled his cousin.

“No guessing again. That’s not how the game works. Show me how many you have.”

Jimmy opened his hands to reveal one lone nut, then reached in his pocket to retrieve the other three.

“The rule of the game is that if I guess wrong, I have to give you the difference between how many I guessed and how many you have. Since I guessed three, and you only have one, I have to give you two more.

Jimmy’s smile broadened as he realized he had just won a game, even though he really didn’t understand the rules, or the point of it all.

Kimball knelt down and very gingerly picked up an oddly-shaped, somewhat bulbous, spiky brown and green ball, about the size of his fist. There were many other balls like it among the leaf litter and twigs on the ground beneath the tree. Some were closed up tight, others had slight openings. Even more were split wide open into four lobes connected in the middle, resembling a thick, woody flower. On the inside, they were a light cream color and reminded Jimmy of dogwood petals—soft and inviting compared to the protective outer shell that more resembled a cactus. Looking at the spiked exterior, he made a mental note to never step on one barefoot.

Kimball flipped over the one he had collected, and carefully pried it open to reveal three shiny nuts just like the ones Jimmy had tucked in his right front pocket. He turned it over, and the nuts dropped onto the ground. He picked two of them up and handed them to Jimmy, added to his growing treasure.

“Your turn.”

“Hull go!”

“I’d say you have… four.”

“Nope! I win again!”

For twenty minutes they called numbers, and traded nuts back and forth. Eventually, when both of them had big piles of nuts on the ground in front of them, Jimmy asked the question he had been thinking the whole time. “What are they?”

“Porcupine nuts,” said Kimball, pointing up at the canopy. “From the porcupine tree.”

Jimmy’s eyes widened as he looked first at the giant tree, then at the growing pile of nuts at his feet. He had heard of porcupines, but he had no idea they grew on trees.

“When will they hatch?” he asked excitedly.

“They don’t hatch. You eat them!”

Jimmy’s brow furrowed.

“You eat porcupines?”

“They aren’t porcupines. They’re the nuts from the porcupine tree.”

“Well, where are the porcupines, then.”

“There ain’t no porcupines. There’s just nuts.”


Jimmy didn’t understand how there could be porcupine nuts without any porcupines, but he couldn’t think of the right questions to help him figure out the mystery before him, so he just listened.

“I heard Papa talking with Sheriff Saylor. He says there won’t be no porcupine nuts much longer, cause of a fungus.”

“A what?”

“A fungus. The Sheriff says its from China and it’s gonna kill all the porcupine trees. He said that the ones up north was already dead, and it was just a matter of time before it comes here. Papa don’t know what he’s gonna do when them trees is gone. That’s what I heard him tell the Sheriff.”

Jimmy picked up one of the nuts and stared at it intently for a moment, then put it in his left pocket, away from the rest. If Kimball had asked why he separated that one from the rest, Jimmy would have been unable to articulate his thoughts, or maybe he would have been too embarrassed to articulate them. But for some reason, he felt a need to protect one nut from whatever that thing China was sending after it. Or, maybe, he just needed to protect something—anything. Jimmy didn’t understand that need but, at least for the moment, it was being met.

The light was almost gone when a voice called out from the cabin and the boys turned around to see Mama standing in the shadows just outside the door. “Come on in for supper, boys!”

The boys stuffed their pockets with the bounty of nuts they had collected and ran toward the cabin. Papa was already seated at the small, square table in the middle of the room when they came inside. A single oil lamp in the middle of the table provided ample light for the room that wasn’t big enough for much more than the table and four chairs, a small wood stove, and a few shelves with just enough pots and dishes. Opposite the stove, a stone fireplace that had provided both heat and open flame for cooking before the stove came, and still provided some heat in the winter. On the far wall, a simple ladder went through a hole in the plank ceiling to the sleeping loft. A narrow doorway next to the ladder led to a recently added bedroom for Kimball’s parents, leaving the loft for their son, and now for Jimmy too. Though small and sparse, the cabin was solid and well-chinked. The floor didn’t creak as the boys stepped inside. Kimball turned out his pockets, dumping his nuts into a basket by the door. Jimmy followed suit, keeping the one nut safely tucked away in his left pocket.

“You boys been playing Hull Go?” Papa asked.

“Kimball taught me,” said Jimmy. “And I won!”

“Is that right…” Papa chuckled. “Well you better keep an eye on that Kimball. You win a few games against him and get comfortable, then he turns around and wins all your nuts before you know what hit you.”

Jimmy looked up suspiciously at his smiling cousin as they climbed into chairs.

“We can roast some of those chestnuts tomorrow,” said Papa. “You’ve never had a roasted chestnut, have you, Jimmy.”

Jimmy shrugged his shoulders timidly.

“He don’t know what chestnuts are,” offered Kimball.

“Ah,” said Papa. “Porcupine nuts,” he clarified with a wink. “We’ll roast porcupine nuts, Jimmy, and you’re gonna love them.”

“Tomorrow, we’ll cross the river, and gather chest… uh, porcupine nuts up on Chestnut Ridge. That’s where the big trees are. Have you ever been in a boat, Jimmy?”

Jimmy shook his head.

“Well tomorrow will be another first for you, then. Just wait ’til you see the trees up there. Some of those trees are so tall you can’t see the top of them, and they are loaded with nuts.”

“Maybe, they are,” said Kimball. “If the fungus ain’t got them yet.”

“Don’t talk like that!” said Papa. His serious tone caught Jimmy by surprise.

From the stove, Mama pitched in. “Now Kimball, your Papa said that the blight hasn’t reached Chestnut Ridge and that it might not…”

“But I heard you talking to Sheriff Saylor…”

“Never you mind what Sheriff Saylor said. The blight ain’t here yet, and until it comes… if it comes,” Papa corrected himself, “If it comes, well, we’ll deal with it when it does.”

“But what about China…?”

“You heard your Papa,” Mama said. “And you have more important things to worry about, like eating this pigeon.” Mama brought a cast iron dutch oven from the stove and set it on a mat in the middle of the small table, then took off the lid. Thick steam curled around the lid as she pulled it away, and with it, the rich smell of pigeon breast and potatoes escaped from the big black pot.

As they dug into their meal, the boys told Mama and Papa all about their day exploring the woods behind the cabin. Jimmy tried to remember all the things he had learned. He recollected that poison ivy had three leaves and some red in the middle, and the vine was hairy, and how Kimball showed him where the raccoons live in the oak tree. “And Kimball showed me the where the older berries grow down by the river,” he said, “but there ain’t none left this year. We’ll have to wait ’til next spring, if the birds don’t get them first.”

“Not older berries, elderberries,” Kimball corrected gently, trying not to laugh and looking at his Papa for approval.

“I mean Elderberries. And I showed him where the spring comes out of the rock, where Uncle Buddy had his still before he got arrested.”

“He doesn’t need to learn about everything on his first day” Mama chimed.

“That’s okay,” said Papa. “Out here in The Gorge, Jimmy, people have to find ways to make a living however they can, and sometimes that means doing things the law doesn’t approve of. Your Uncle Buddy was just finding his way, in his own way.

“My Papa told me about him,” said Jimmy. “He told me that Uncle Buddy didn’t deserve to be in jail. He said his liquor wasn’t good enough to get arrested for and that if he had made the good stuff and sold it to the white folks he wouldn’t have been arrested. Papa said that he only got in trouble cause he was selling to the negroes. That’s what Papa said.”

Jimmy was surprised to hear himself saying so much, and even as he spoke he knew he should be quiet, that this was not a story he should be telling, even if he didn’t know exactly why.

“Well, your Papa was probably right about that but, deserved or not, that’s where he ended up, and we’re gonna make sure we don’t end up there with him. That’s why tomorrow we’re gonna fill that boat up with porcupine nuts and after we cure them, we’ll take them to town and sell them at the curb market. The law don’t mind us selling porcupine nuts.”

After supper, Mama brought out what Kimball had been careful not to tell his cousin. For Jimmy’s first night in The Gorge, Mama surprised him with the last apple pie of the season, and all four of them had generous slices.

When the pie was dispatched, the boys loaded up the dishes in a basket and walked back to the spring where first they washed the dishes, then washed themselves. Kimball bit his tongue and did not say anything more about the infamy of that spring, nor did he point out the galvanized tank a little farther into the woods with all the hatchet holes in it. There would be time for more of Uncle Buddy’s story later.

It was bedtime when they walked back to the house, and climbed up to the loft. Kimball was exhausted from a full day of exploring and teaching his cousin. Jimmy was exhausted from the weight of the world.

In town Jimmy had a proper spring mattress on a frame all to himself, but in the gorge he shared a dense tick on the floor with his cousin, and he was glad to not be sleeping alone.

“Do you miss your Papa?” Kimball whispered in the dark. “Mama said I shouldn’t bring up your Papa, but I figure you might want to talk about it. You don’t have to.”

“Yeah, I miss him. But not Miss Caroline. She wasn’t my mama, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. That’s why you came here to live with us.”

“I’m glad I’m here, but I miss my Papa.”

“Well my Papa says he’s your Papa too now, but that you don’t have to call him that if you don’t want to. He understands.”

Jimmy didn’t say anything more, but he knew he was lucky to have another Papa. After the funeral, Miss Caroline had told him that it would be okay to start calling his uncle “Papa” that his own Papa would understand. But Jimmy wasn’t ready for that. Not yet.

Kimball rolled over and was quickly breathing the smooth, easy breath of a worn out boy, leaving Jimmy, for the first time that day, feeling alone and lonely. He wished his cousin would wake back up.

Jimmy laid on his back in the dark. The quiet of the gorge was new to him and it made him feel even lonelier. He closed his eyes and pictured the small house he lived in with his Papa and Miss Caroline. He had his own room there, with a window that faced the neighbor’s house. At night he would hear dogs barking in the neighborhood, and sometimes he would wake up to the sound of men stumbling home late from a poker game or one of the speakeasies that had opened in the couple years since they made liquor illegal. He wondered why anybody would want to drink something that made them loud and unsteady, and why his Uncle Buddy was willing to take the risk he did to make it. He thought Miss Caroline made sense when she said that prohibition was a good thing. She said nothing ever came to no good when a man takes to drinking. His Papa didn’t agree with his wife, but he didn’t argue with her.

In the four years she was married to his Papa, he never called Miss Caroline his Mama, even though he knew she wanted him to. He liked her alright, and he knew his Papa loved her, but she never felt like his Mama. Jimmy was only four when his Mama died giving birth to his little sister who died a few hours later. His Papa married Miss Caroline a year after that. And now his Papa was dead too.

Nobody asked Jimmy what he wanted to do. After the funeral, he was told by Miss Caroline that he would be living with his Aunt, Uncle and Cousin in the River Gorge and that was that. His Uncle Tom and Aunt Dorothy were dropped off in town by Mr. Selma who lived farther back in the gorge. They drove back to The Gorge in his Papa’s Ford. Miss Caroline had made sure all Jimmy’s things were packed in the trunk before they arrived, and goodbyes were short.

As Jimmy stared at the low, angled ceiling, he wondered if Miss Caroline would keep living in their house, and if he would still have a room there if he visited, or if he wanted to visit at all. He rolled over on his side, closed his eyes, and slipped into a dream.

He was standing at home plate, looking out at the field. The sun was bright overhead and he pulled his hat down to shade his eyes. His Papa stood on the mound wearing a gray uniform with a red 34 on his chest. Beyond the diamond an outfielder with shaggy blond hair stood beneath a giant tree. The tree’s limbs were loaded with spiky green balls that weren’t quite round and were stitched together with red laces. The outfielder picked a ball from the tree and threw it to his Papa who held it in his glove for a long time before leaning forward and staring intently at the catcher. He shook his head once, then shook it again, then nodded. Then he wound up, and hurled the strange ball toward him. The ball corkscrewed through the air in slow motion, headed straight toward the middle of the plate, waist high. No matter how hard he tried, Jimmy couldn’t swing the bat. His arms felt like they were being held down, pinned to his sides by an invisible force. As the ball reached the plate, it opened up into a white flower, spinning like a pinwheel. From the middle of the flower, three nuts spiraled out over the plate. The flower gradually slowed and floated to the ground between his feet.

“Strike one, strike two, strike three… Hull Go! You’re out!” Jimmy turned to look at the umpire who had just called him out on one pitch. The umpire, a porcupine dressed in black and white striped pajamas, looked over the catcher’s shoulder. The catcher opened his glove and three tiny pink porcupines crawled out of the glove, up the catcher’s arm, and down his back. The umpire knelt down and opened a pouch in the front of his pajamas. The tiny porcupines jumped in. The catcher pulled off the pajamas and left them piled on the plate, then scurried across the diamond and out to the tree in center field. He climbed up the trunk until he came to a large round hole where an old limb had broken off, and disappeared inside.

Jimmy looked around. The sun was gone and a quarter moon dimly lit a suddenly empty field. He was the only one there. He picked up the striped pajamas from the plate and put them on. From somewhere up in the tree, a whippoorwill called out its own name.

He searched for the bird in the canopy, but the song seemed to come from everywhere at once. He didn’t know where to look. When the bird stopped calling, the baseball field was gone and he was standing in the middle of a dense forest in his striped pajamas. There was just enough moonlight coming through the trees for him to find his way and he started walking, but the ground was littered with the spiked hulls of porcupine eggs that pierced his bare feet. He sat down, leaned against a tree, and began to cry. A hairy vine growing up the tree was soft against his face, and he nuzzled against it and closed his eyes.

Kimball was already out of bed and downstairs when Jimmy woke up and climbed down the ladder. “Papa’s loading the boat. There’s a biscuit on the table for you,” Kimball said. “Mama packed a lunch for us. Come on! Papa’s waiting!”

Jimmy grabbed the biscuit off the table and the two boys ran out the door and down to the river where Papa was standing in the back of the boat holding onto the sixteen-food pole that would propel them across the river. They stepped into the front of the boat and sat down beside each other on a wooden bench. “Hold on!” called Papa. “We’re shoving off!”

There wasn’t much to hold onto in the front of the boat, plus Jimmy had a biscuit in his hand. Kimball laughed. “Papa just likes to say that, so we’ll think there’s danger. Ain’t nothing to worry about.”

Jimmy looked up and down a river that was mostly shrouded in a low, dense fog like clouds floating on the current. The boat slid softly across the water, a cloud swirling behind it. He took a bite out of his biscuit, and reached down with his left hand to feel a single porcupine nut in his left hip pocket.

The Sore-eye Bird

A while back I posted a chapter from the book I am working on and received some great feedback–some of which I am still wrestling with. Here is another chapter draft. Please let me know what you think. Any and all feedback is welcome from simple typos to major issues. Thanks! I have been working on the book a lot this month, and hope to put some more pieces out there for your perusal soon, so please check back often. If you like it, feel free to share it with others. The more readers, the better.

The Sore-eye Bird

The boys stood around a small fire in a clearing, just a few yards into the woods. As the crow flies, they were only three hundred yards from the cabin, but between them and home was an unpredictable river and a lot of darkness.

“Birds are about to migrate,” Kimball said with all the authority a newly-minted thirteen year old could muster. “The leaves on the poplars are the size of squirrel’s ears. We’re right on time.”

Jimmy nodded silently.

“I reckon the migration will start tonight… if It’s dark enough for the giants. Birds can’t come ’til the giants do, you know.”

Up to this point, Jimmy believed everything his cousin told him, and why wouldn’t he? All winter his cousin had taught him volumes about the forest and river, but giants pushed his trust. “There’s no such thing as giants,” he argued confidently.

“Yes, there are, Papa told me that Me-maw saw one once. And you know Me-maw would only say the truth… and I heard them last year!”

Kimball knew that bringing up Me-maw would give his claim a special gravity. Me-maw (or Ms. Olive, as she was known by all the folks in the Gorge who weren’t kin) was a legend up and down the gorge and on both sides of Chestnut Ridge, and Jimmy was envious that Kimball had known her. Me-Maw passed away when Kimball was four years old, but he had heard so many stories about her, that he honestly thought he had known her personally. Her face, her long silver hair, her gentle voice were as clear to him as his memories of swimming in the river last summer. That’s the way memories are when you’re thirteen.

There were more stories about Me-maw than there were stories in the Bible, and folks said she knew stuff nobody else knew. Mama told them that her grandmother-in-law was part Indian, though nobody knew what “kind of Indian” she was, and that the stories she told were passed down through many generations. “You can’t find that kind of wisdom in books, or in school,” she told her son. “That is the wisdom of the elders.”

Kimball took what his Mama told him about Me-maw to be gospel, and so did Jimmy.

Jimmy leaned in, as Kimball continued. “Giants use the river like we use roads,” He said. They travel the rivers because if they traveled on land, they would leave footprints and then people could track them. There aren’t very many giants left so they have to be extra careful not to be found out by people.”

Coming from his teen-aged cousin, who once sat at the feet of Me-maw, this made perfect sense, and Jimmy nodded his head slowly to show his understanding then looked towards the river with wide eyes.

“You don’t need to worry,” Kimball reassured him. “They won’t come out until after we are asleep, and even when they do, they don’t want to hurt you. They will be busy talking to the trees. If you wake up in the middle of the night, you might hear them, but it will be dark. You won’t see them.”

“What do they say to the trees?”

“They wake them up. The trees fall asleep for the winter, and if nobody wakes them up, there won’t be no spring. That’s why it’s important that we leave the giants alone and don’t bother them. We don’t know the language of the trees. Nobody does. Only the giants know. They sound kinda like pine trees in the wind. You know, squeaks and stuff like that. I heard them for the first time when I was your age. Papa told me what it was. He said that Me-maw’s daddy could understand what they were saying but that there ain’t nobody around now who still knows the language. Papa says that the maple trees wake up first. You’ll see in the morning… if they come tonight.”

The boys stayed awake as late as they could, bundled in blankets beneath their little a-frame shelter strung between trees. Several times Jimmy heard noises and asked Kimball if it was giants, but the elder cousin explained each noise as it came—an owl hooting, a deer heading to the river for a drink of water, a raccoon digging for grubs, a flying squirrel landing on the ground. He had answers for everything and Jimmy felt safe as long as he had such a woods-wise companion.

The morning was cold, and the two adventurers stayed in their blankets until the sun hit the top of the west rim. Kimball got up first and piled twigs and leaves where the fire had been the night before. A hard breath revealed orange coals beneath the grey ashes and soon a small flame emerged. Jimmy watched all this from his woolen cocoon until the fire appears to have enough heat to ward off the chill. Kimball was unwrapping a small loaf of bread when Kimball walked up the fire and leaned in, rubbing his hands together for warmth. Kimball reached into his bag and pulled out a piece of cheese wrapped in wax paper, and made two crude open-face sandwiches out of torn chunks of bread and cheese. “Breakfast?”

After warming up and eating, Jimmy followed Kimball down the narrow path until they reached the river where their little boat, wet with dew, was tied to a persimmon tree at the shore. Across the river, smoke rose from the chimney of their cabin, and though Kimball secretly wished he was sitting on the hearth with a warm bowl of porridge, he was relieved he didn’t have to sit in a cold, wet metal boat.

“Look,” said Kimball, pointing across the river at the steep hillside above the cabin.

“What?” asked Jimmy.

“The maple trees—they woke up. The giants were hear!”

Across the river, above the cabin on the steep western slope of the plateau, scattered, bright red blotches glowed here and there on an otherwise dull, gray canvas. The two young boys stared in awe at the clear proof of the existence of giants, and the first evidence of spring.

“As the giants wake up the maple trees, the sore-eye birds follow the red,” said Kimball. That’s how they know where to go. You know about the sore-eye birds, right?” Kimball asked, knowing that his cousin did not.

A shake of Jimmy’s head gave Kimball permission to tell the next part of the story.

“You remember last spring, how Papa had all those allergies—all that sneezing and blowing his nose, and how his eyes got all red and swollen and itchy?”

“Uh huh.”

“Well, that is because nobody got him a feather from the sore-eye bird. Mama told me that Me-maw taught her that if you take a feather from a sore-eye bird, soak it in water, then bathe your eyes in the water, you’ll be cured of all that. Now that the giants woke up the maple trees, the sore-eye birds should be here. All we have to do is find one, and we can cure Papa of his allergies.”

Leaving Jimmy to ponder giants and magical birds, Kimball walked back to the camp and retrieved his slingshot from his bag. “I’ve been practicing all winter for this,” he said confidently.

Jimmy had spent nearly every waking moment of his first winter in the River Gorge, and had never seen his cousin’s slingshot, but he chose not to question Kimball’s assertion. Instead, he asked Kimball how they would find the sore-eye bird.

“It’s easy. We listen. Mama said that sometimes the sore-eye bird sounds like a robin with a sore throat. Other times it says chick-burr, chick-burr. We’ll find a good spot in the woods for listening, and when it calls, we’ll follow it’s voice.”

They walked further into the woods until they came to the old road. Beyond the road, the ground became steep, and Kimball decided a road would be a good place to listen, so they sat down. Jimmy looked north, Kimball looked south, and they listened.

It seemed like all the winter birds were singing that morning, and Kimball identified with authority the few he recognized. A white-throated sparrow called for Mister Peabody, a wren said teakettle, teakettle, teakettle, and a chick-a-dee said his own name over and over. There were many more birds Kimball didn’t recognized, and whenever Jimmy would ask him what they were, Jimmy would either pretend he didn’t hear him, hold up his hand to be quiet because he was listening hard at the moment, or change the subject to something that suddenly seemed very important, like wondering if skunks could climb trees or if giants were afraid of daylight.

Kimball was unsure what a robin with a sore throat sounded like, but he listened closely, and when a lot of birds were singing at once, he proclaimed, “There it is, the sore-eye bird.” Jimmy asked which one of the many songs heard was the sore-eye bird, but Kimball never seemed to hear it again. Kimball was, however, certain that the song came from the north, and he confidently led the search party in that direction.

“The sore-eye bird is bright red with black wings,” Kimball said. “Keep on the lookout.” And look, Jimmy did. He scanned the treetops, turning his head in search of every bird he heard. Being early in the spring, the leaves on the trees were tiny, so the canopy afforded good bird watching. After a few minutes of waling down the over-grown old road, Jimmy pointed to a flash of red high in the canopy. “Is that it?” he asked.

Kimball looked up to see to see the bright red bird high in a poplar tree. Jimmy smiled broadly, proud of his discovery. Kimball looked at the slingshot in his left hand, and sat down on a rock. “We’ll have to wait for it to come down. Keep your eye on it.” Kimball was trying to maintain an air of authority and confidence, but secretly he was hoping the bird would disappear. He had never shot at a bird with his slingshot, and the couple squirrels he had tried to shoot were missed by a foot or more. He looked away from the bird, leaving the responsibility for tracking it on his inexperienced young companion.

“There is goes.” said Jimmy. “Let’s go!” The sore-eye bird was on the move, flying away from the river and up the steep slope. The boys followed, clamoring over the boulders and scree that covered the hillside. The bright feathers of the sore-eye bird stood out in a forest whose young leaves were just beginning to pop out. As the boys stayed on the trail, climbing higher and higher, the sore-eye bird stayed out of reach until half-way up the slope the land leveled off onto a shelf. Ahead of them, a shear bluff would prevent them from climbing higher, but they wouldn’t have to. To their right, a spring seeped from the base of the bluff and flowed into a small pond. The sore-eye bird swooped down over the water and landed on the very top of a small elder berry bush at the edge of the water, not fifteen feet away.

Slowly, Kimball reached in his pocket and pulled out one of several small, smooth pebbles he had collected from the river. He loaded his slingshot, extended his left arm, and with his right hand pulled back the letter thong that held the rock. Looking down the stretched rubber cords, he took aim and, just as the sore-eye bird began to sing a raspy, flute-like song like a robin with a sore throat, he closed his eyes and released.

Jimmy watched as the pebble made a gentle arc towards the singing bird, and in an instant his cousin Kimball grew from questionable mentor to infallible guru.
The sore eye bird stopped singing and fell limp to the forest floor.

When Kimball opened his eyes, Jimmy was already standing over the most beautiful bird—perhaps the most beautiful animal—he had ever seen, dead on the forest floor. Kimball was shocked. Jimmy was awestruck. Both were saddened. Neither spoke.

A couple hours later they tied the boat off at the dock, unloaded their gear, and walked up to the cabin. Mama, who had seen them coming, was heating soup on the wood stove. “How was your adventure?” she asked as the boys dropped their bedrolls and approached the stove. “Did you hear the giants?”

Neither of the sullen boys acknowledged the question. Kimball reached in his bag and pulled out an odd little package. Through wax paper, the bright red and stark black of the sore-eye bird were as muted and dull as he felt inside. He didn’t understand why doing such a good thing for his Papa felt so bad.

Slowly he unwrapped the now stiff contents as his Mama looked on with furrowed brow. “What happened? Did you find him in the woods?” she asked, genuinely confused.

“It’s for Papa… for his eyes,” Kimball said slowly, handing the bird to Mama.

“Yes, but…” Mama did not finish her thought.

She took the package from her son and slowly unwrapped the contents. The sore-eye bird’s eye was closed, it’s neck was limp, and it’s head hung from a lifeless body.

You did this?” she asked softly.

Kimball looked at the floor. “For Papa,” he choked. His eyes welled with tears and he began to sob.

Jimmy, who had been looking on in silence from behind his cousin, began to cry too.

Mama took her boys, one in each arm, and held them tight. Tears began to trickle down her checks as well.

Finally, Kimball managed two weak words. “I’m sorry,” he said in a high, broken voice. The three of them sat down on the hearth, backs to the stove, Mama in the middle, arms around the two crying boys.

She could have told her boys that all they were supposed to bring back was a feather, and that it should be a gift from the bird. She could have said that, according to Me-Maw, killing a bird that provides medicine brings about the illness it cures. She could have told him that his Me-maw’s name, Olive, meant peace. There were many things she could have said, but didn’t. Instead, she sat silently with Kimball and Jimmy until all the tears were drained from their eyes, then she served soup which they ate in silence.

When they were finished eating, Kimball asked if he could clean up by himself. He took the bowls, cups and spoons out to the spring and washed them while Jimmy and Mama sat on the hearth.

“Tell me more about Me-maw,” said Jimmy.

“Well, your Me-maw was a very smart and very loved woman, Jimmy. And wise. But the two things I admired most about her were her calm spirit and her never ending thirst for knowledge. If anything ever upset her, she never showed it. And if she wasn’t helping somebody with their ailment, their injury, or their emotional problem, she was studying the plants and animals of the gorge.”

“How did she study? Did she have a teacher?”

“That is a good question, Jimmy. A lot of people wondered that. Your Me-maw spent countless days walking deep into the gorge, and sometimes climbing out of the gorge to the plateau. She never took anybody with her, and nobody knew exactly where she went, but she always came back with new herbs, roots, or recipes. Some people thought she met with an old medicine woman somewhere on the plateau who stayed behind when the native people were driven off. Other people suggested that she took magic herbs and had visions while she was on her walks.”

“What do you think, Miss Dorothy?”

The look on Jimmy’s face was serious and inquisitive. To Dorothy, her nephew looked like for the first time in the five months since he moved in with them, his focus was entirely on the moment, and not distracted by thoughts of his father. She tousled his hair that had not been cut since his arrival in the gorge and had become quite shaggy.

“I think it’s time I give you a haircut,” she said with a warm smile.

“No, tell me more about Me-maw. What do you think she was doing on those walks. Kimball told me that you have her journals and they have all of her secrets.”

“I do have her journals, and they have a lot of information about her many medicines—drawings of plants, recipes… Perhaps one day I will show them to you.”

The door opened and Kimball came back inside with a basket of clean dishes which he put away on the shelves.

“What are you boys doing this afternoon?” asked Mama.

Kimball looked at the wax paper package on the table and said, “I guess we need to do something to make it right.”

“I think that is what your Me-maw would say,” Mama responded.

Jimmy and his aunt exchanged a warm look and a smile, and Kimball wondered what it was about but didn’t ask.

“Come on, Jimmy,” said Kimball. Let’s go out to the barn and find a shovel.
Jimmy carried the shovel and Kimball carried the sore-eye bird as they walked across the yard from the barn.

“Where are we gonna bury him?” asked Jimmy.

“I don’t know. I think he should be somewhere where he can see the sunrise and look across the river at the ridge where he lived.”

Just below the redbud tree at the northeast corner of the property, about ten feet fro, the river bank, Kimball stopped. “Right here,” he said matter-of-factly. “This is the right place.”

Jimmy stuck the point of the shovel into the soil, and raised a foot to plunge it into the earth, but Kimball stopped him. “I need to do this,” he said.

He took the handle of the shovel with his left and hand and reached toward Jimmy with his right, gently handing over the little red corpse. The soil by the river was rich and soft and Kimball had an appropriate hole dug with only five or six easy shovelfuls. Jimmy then handed him the still-wrapped bird, and Kimball carefully opened the paper and lifted it out. “I guess we’ll have to find a feather for Papa’s eyes somewhere else,” he said somberly.

“Yeah, I guess we will,” responded Kimball. “He sure is pretty, ain’t he?”

“Yeah, he sure is.”

To the bird, Kimball said simply, “I’m sorry,” then knelt down and placed it in the bottom of an eighteen-inch-deep hole, sprinkled some dirt over it, and stood back up. “Should we say something?” he asked.

“Only if you want to. I think what you feel is more important than what you say. I think that might be what Me-maw would say.”

“Yeah, maybe so.”

Kimball took the shovel he had stuck in the ground next to the hole and scooped too three shovelfuls of dirt on top of the sore-eye bird.

“Wait,” said Jimmy.


“I’ll be right back.”

Jimmy ran over to the porcupine tree and rustled around in the leaves, kicking them aside, then getting onto all fours and rummaging around through the thick litter. After a couple minutes he found what he was looking for and ran back to where Kimball was waiting with the shovel.

In his hand was a chestnut. “It’s been on the ground since last fall. Ya think it will still grow?”

“I guess so.”

Jimmy wiped the nut off on his pants until it shone like brand new and knelt down to place it in the dirt atop the bird.

Standing back up, he said “Okay,” and with that Kimball shoveled the rest of the dirt over the nut.

“I think we should give it some water,” said Jimmy.

Kimball said okay, and they ran back to the barn where they put away the shovel and retrieved a small pail which they filled from the river and slowly poured over the freshly mounded grave. The soil muddied and sunk and the boys watched as it slowly subsided.

“Want to go back over to the ridge and look for a feather?” Jimmy asked, trying to be helpful.

“Naw, I think we should wait. Maybe tomorrow.”

“Yeah, maybe tomorrow.”

A Downy Visitor

Pileated, red-bellied, and yellow-bellied woodpeckers all come regularly for the suet, but the little downies are nearly omnipresent at the feeding station. Male and female sometimes come together, other times they are loners but, odds are, if you look out the kitchen window during daylight hours, one of them will be there. The female is currently understandably skittish after visiting me in the house early in the week, requiring capture to find her way back out.

The male, however, is quite comfortable with me and afforded a few nice photographs this afternoon. With the temperatures dropping tonight and last night’s rain not affecting the drought conditions, I expect the feeding and watering stations to stay busy, and I will be around with the camera, so stay tuned.

Here are the photos from today along with red-bellied woodpecker and yellow-bellied sapsucker visiting the persimmons in the past couple weeks. Enjoy!

Male on Branch-2.jpg

Male on Branch-3.jpg

Male on Branch.jpg

Persimmon Tree-2.jpg



One of Her and Eleven of Us

As happy as I was to have hiking guides and transportation for my last day on the island, I was a bit disappointed to see a dog in the car when they arrived to pick me up. I love dogs—especially labs—but my main goal on Kodiak (and the main reason I extended my trip two days) was the opportunity to see more brown bears. Earlier in the week, I had seen a sow with two cubs, but at such a distance that even through binoculars they were little more than specks. Now, with a retriever along, I couldn’t imagine getting close enough to a bear for a decent look, much less a photograph. But I wasn’t going to let what I perceived as decreased odds prevent me from enjoying a hike on Kodiak.

Coming on the heels of several days of heavy rain, this second day in a row of clearing skies made for near perfect October hiking weather. The trail began in what is most accurately described as a swamp. Emerging from the swamp, it followed—and often shared—the path of a steep drainage. Our destination was a small natural lake with views across the bay. Borrowed Xtratuf boots proved to be best friends when I more than once sank nearly a foot into the muck as we criss-crossed in and out of the shallow creek. Throughout the climb, the retriever took great delight in flushing, chasing, but never catching snowshoe hares through a seemingly impenetrable tangle on the slopes up either side of the draw. Watching the giant rabbit appearing thirty yards ahead of the dog, I couldn’t help but think of br’er rabbit saying, “Please don’t throw me in the alder patch!” Though only a mile-and-a-half, the trek was strenuous enough at times to work the lungs and make arrival at the picturesque Heitman Lake feel earned.


Following a brief rest and lakeside snack, we decided to hike to the upper end of the basin and summit a rocky outcropping my hosts assured would provide the best views. Pausing to take some photos before climbing the peak, I couldn’t imagine the perspective from the peak to be any more spectacular than where we were. The lake formed a wavy-edged trapezoid, tapering away from us toward Broad Point—a rough and rocky spit of land separating Middle and Kalsin Bays. Beyond the point, the much larger Chinak Bay reached towards the edge of the earth where it merged with a dramatically layered, cloud-filled sky. The nearest layer of clouds, a patchy mix of cottony cumulus, was mirrored in the calm lake at our feet.

As we photographed the scene, distant voices from over my left shoulder caught my attention. I turned to look across a narrow, shallow valley expecting to see some hikers, but the voices were carrying from farther up the trail than I could see. Turning back towards the lake, movement across the valley caught my eye. A single brown bear was following the far ridge. Our plans to summit the peak changed.


Our first order of business was to corral the dog, which was easy to do with the exceptionally well-behaved lab. Second order of business was to move a little closer and find a good vantage point for photographs.

We had not been watching the bruin long when the source of the voices appeared. A pair of hunters, accompanied by a dog and packing out a deer, were heading our way, paralleling the path of the bear. They were a safe distance behind the bear and would soon meet up with us on the trail. As the hunters reached us, we heard a second set of voices coming from the opposite direction, and a young couple with their dog appeared on the trail ahead. Soon there were eleven of us—seven Homo sapiens sapiens, three Canis lupus familiaris, and one very dead Odocoileus hemionus sitkensis which we figured must smell mighty good to one quite large Ursus arctos middendorffi.


An easy decision was made to stick together, and we followed the bear from behind as she browsed, sniffed, ambled and shat her way along the valley, choosing a perfect route and exhibiting great behavior for photo opportunities. She crested the low ridge for stunning profiles, sat for a while to survey the bay, and occasionally looked over her shoulder at the twenty-six legged beast following her. When she stood on hind legs for dramatic effect, she looked like a giant teddy bear—dark brown legs contrasting a much lighter brown body and head. From a distance she looked darn near cuddly until I raised the binoculars to see the three-plus inch claws curving out from the ends of her giant paws. Always aware, she never showed any concern and never posed any threat to us. The dogs were well-enough behaved, and the couple who had been hiking in the other direction decided to cut their hike short and walk out in the comfort and safety of numbers.

Big Brown Bear.jpg

We were an interesting lot, to say the least. The hunting party was comprised of a young novice, and a not much older mentor who mostly talked about how he would come back and “drop” that sow or “stick” her. He was confident that he had seen this same bear the year before and it was only a matter of time before he skinned her in an act of great masculinity. On the other end of the spectrum, the young couple was not comfortable in such close proximity to a great Kodiak bear and was more than relieved to have found us before the bear found them. As for our party, I think we were all simply in awe of such an animal and honored to have the experience. For my companions who live on the island and work for Kodiak National Wildlife Refuge, I suppose hiking alongside such a magnificent creature might be routine, even old hat. For me, however, it was an unforgettable experience. It was not my first big bear, but it was the closest I have been to one that big, and I do believe it might have been the most beautiful bear I have ever come across. (Although the honey-colored little grizzly I saw on the Russian River in 2015 certainly comes close.)

Big Brown Bear-4.jpg

We stayed with the bear until she… I should pause here to say that I was not able to identify the bear as a female. I say “she” throughout this writing only because that is what the hunter said. When I researched the difference between male and female grizzlies, I was led to think this might be a male, but I don’t know. Perhaps a reader with more experience and knowledge can weigh in with a definitive answer. As I was saying… We stayed with the bear until (she) crossed the ridge in front of us, passed through the top of the drainage we just hiked, and disappeared over the other side.

Our hike back down was a bit of a circus. Out of harms way, the dogs were let loose and they took full advantage of their freedom—running, playing chase, nearly knocking people off their feet more than once. They had earned it, and nobody complained.

Next time I visit Kodiak, I hope to return to the Heitman Lake trail. Next time I want to continue beyond where we turned back. According to, it is a strenuous ten mile round trip beyond Heitman Lake to Raymond Peak and Heitman Mountain. And and if they are interested, I would love for my hiking companions—all three of them—to join me for the trek!


Birding by Ear in Anchorage

I am downstairs, sitting in the rocking chair next to the hearth where the wood stove used to be. It is early morning. I am thinking about the next three weeks of travel, and writing. To my left is a small table. Beyond the table, a sliding glass door leads to a tiny patio. The world outside is dark and quiet. I stop writing when I hear, from the direction of the door, a remarkably loud birdsong. The voice is unmistakable—an American robin. Then it sings again. On the second verse I realize how unusually raspy it sounds and begin to question my quick identification. Perhaps it isn’t a robin at all. Perhaps there is a resident Alaskan songbird whose call is similar to a robin but rougher, harsher. Some people describe the scarlet tanager’s song as “a robin with a sore throat,” but I don’t think I would confuse a tanager with a robin. I hear both birds often enough back home on the farm to have a good grasp of their distinctions, plus Alaska is a long way from scarlet tanager range.

Leaving journal and pen on the table, I walk to the door. It is still dark out on this Anchorage morning, but the lights in the condominium parking lot provide more than ample glow to see a bird, were one perched on the fence. I scan the patio, the fence, and parking lot beyond. There is no bird in sight, everything is quiet, and I don’t hear the bird again.

Returned to my seat, I keep thinking about that voice. I listen to the morning silence, hoping it will sing again, and wondering. Perhaps it wasn’t a robin… I retrieve my computer from the bedroom upstairs and search for fall Alaska songbirds. There is nothing to be found online that fits the description other than robin, but with no more songs I can’t be sure. I wonder why it stopped singing so soon after it began. Was the raspiness due to a sore throat? A sore throat would make me stop singing. Or did the resident cat rear its head, cutting short the morning hymns? 

I walk back to the door to have another look. Overhead, I hear the ticking of a clock and look up to mark the time. My host Jerry knows his birds, and if I describe the song and the approximate time I heard it, he will identify it. Directly above the door, the clock is a large, round, white analog model, bearing the familiar logo of the National Audubon Society. Representing each hour is a different common North American bird. One o’clock is the great horned owl, 2:00 — northern mockingbird, 3:00 — black-capped chickadee, 4:00 — northern cardinal… It is now a quarter past seven. Fifteen minutes ago… at seven o’clock… the clock struck… the American robin.

I am still chuckling at my morning encounter with the not-quite-right roborobin when Jerry comes down the steps. Soon, he is laughing with me. We have a cup of coffee, and discuss plans for the day. Jerry reads the paper while I finish my writing. Before long, the digitally reproduced, unusually loud, raspy voice of a song sparrow brings another chuckle and reminds us it is time for breakfast.

As we walk out to the car, I am pretty certain I hear a real live robin across the parking lot. Jerry does not hear it, but confirms that some robins do overwinter in Anchorage, though most migrate south, and that fall would be an odd time to hear them singing. I can tell he doesn’t believe I heard what I think I heard, but I am convinced. Everybody needs a friend, and I suspect there must be one robin in Anchorage who recognizes the lone, raspy voice in Jerry’s condominium. There must be one robin willing to sing out of season, offering friendship to an unseen, two-dimensional bird on a cool, dark Alaska morning. Or, maybe an unseen voice inside my head is hard at work helping me avoid being the only one — bird or birder — to be duped by a singing clock.


These lyrics came to me one evening while driving the roads on Kodiak Island and I thought maybe a few folks might appreciate them. Feel free to comment–especially if you are a poet or a songwriter. I fancy myself neither, so you won’t hurt my feelings. Stay tuned for some slightly more serious (and hopefully better) writing inspired by my Alaska trip over the next few days…


There’s a man up near the tree line
Named for a prophet in a book
He’s hiding from his brothers
And the paths that they all took

His clothes are rags and colored
And his feet are bare and bent
He doesn’t own pajamas
Doesn’t know the president

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

He is dark and he is clean
Spends 90 dollars on his soap
But don’t ask about the mailbox
He just don’t get that joke

And he builds a lot of fires
Burning pallets, logs and bricks
If you tell him that it’s summertime
He says the smoke is thick

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

His best friend is a raven
Calls her Jezebel
Collects her fallen feathers
For a potion or a spell

He wears a tiny padlock
On a bracelet on his wrist
It is locked for all eternity
There is no key for it

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

Up there on the mountain
He builds a wooden boat
He grows a lot of radishes
With no shovel or rope

His frame is thin and solid
his muscles taut and long
He doesn’t have a birthday
Doesn’t sing a favorite song

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

He never makes a footprint
On the mossy, craggy trail
But the goshawk and the owl
Follow closely on his tail

He sometimes picks a mushroom
From a tree beside the brook
Though his whole world is the forest
That is all he ever took

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

He might not live forever
But he will not die alone
The magpies and the grizzlies
Will know when he is gone

Until then he will wander
Out of sight from all the town
’til within an ancient mossy stump
He lays his body down

His house is caving in
But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin

But he stays up on the mountain
Where the air is fresh and thin
Yeah he lives up on the mountain
Where his air is fresh and thin

October Treasures

Gray Catbird and Rose-breasted Grosbeak Sharing a Limb

On any given day there are many reasons to walk the farm—discoveries to be made, wildlife to encounter. This time of year, I like to see what is blooming, hear who is singing or fluttering by, check for tracks around the pond. Every day there is a chance for newly arriving, or passing through migrants. The rose-breasted grosbeaks have been around for a few weeks now, hummingbirds are still defensive around the feeders, a black and white warbler stopped in a couple days ago, and a half dozen house finches have joined the goldfinches at the feeder. Gulf fritillaries are finding fall flowers, and a spectacular of array of yellow asters covers the field along with goldenrod. Persimmons and apples are ripe in the trees, and gift me with their delicacy on nearly every walk, while black walnuts and pecans are not ready for dropping just yet.

Gulf Fritillary Enjoying the Flower Garden

Yesterday evening, while eating an apple I had just picked en route to the mailbox, I came across a pile of rain-eroded scat at the edge of the driveway. I put on my glasses and knelt down to have a closer look to find that I was not the only one enjoying seasonal fruit these days. Apparently a resident raccoon has been feasting as well—evidenced by the dozen or more persimmon seeds in his excrement—a treasure!
After depositing my letter, I went to the kitchen for a ziplock bag and a paper towel, then headed back to the driveway to collect my newfound seeds. The refrigerator already has several of these bags, and there will be more before the season ends. Every summer I search out native fruit-bearing trees—persimmon and pawpaw—and relish in their sweet offerings. Every year I say to myself, this is the year. This year, I will save these seeds. This year I will plant trees. This year.

Persimmon Seeds in Raccoon Scat


Recently, a friend with a few wooded acres south of here granted me permission to grow some trees on his property. The seeds in my refrigerator are experiencing a simulated winter in preparation for planting there. The cold will scarify the seeds, enabling them to germinate. For a minimum of forty days they will chill, hopefully emerging ready to sprout. Some seeds, like many prairie plants, or the lodgepole pines of Yellowstone, are scarified through wildfires. Others, like the cedar trees that sprout along so many fence rows are prepared for germination in the digestive tracts of birds. Pawpaws and Persimmons like the cold.
Chickadees bring a smile to my face with their chatter, but remain out of sight in the canopy as I count twenty-seven shiny brown flat seeds in the scat, each a little smaller in diameter than a dime. One by one, I pick the seeds out of their crumbling encasement and place them on the paper towel. Then I think about the scat and realize it would be a waste to leave that rich fertilizer on the driveway. I gather it as well, carefully picking every last crumble out of the gravel. I fold the towel, insert it in the bag, and label it: “persimmon in raccoon scat 9/26.” Before refrigerating it, I will sprinkle a little water in the bag to keep it moist and seal it shut. Nothing says Autumn like a back of raccoon crap in your refrigerator!
When I am ready to plant my seeds I will record the date they were collected, the time they were refrigerated, and whether or not they were “raccooned.” By keeping those records, I will learn what processing results in the highest rate of germination. If “raccooned” seeds prove more successful than the seeds only refrigerated, I will have more work on my hands next year, but I don’t mind. Searching the woods for raccoon scat sounds like a perfectly lovely October activity to me!
For now, though, I will pick another apple and continue my rounds to see what other autumn treasures reveal themselves.